Wednesday 26th June 2013

Pamir Highway, here we come

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Well, three out of the four of us have upset stomachs. Guess which one could still eat curry for breakfast? (Metaphorically speaking). Atle mends his fan, we clear out rubbish from car. Throw out 3 eggs from home, milk, courgettes, onions and potatoes from Austria. Found melted chocolate, put in fridge as we may need it later. Should have started our anti malaria tablets two days ago. Oh well, start them now. Stock up on water, fizzy drinks and water melon. Might feel like eating some this evening. Tried to ask stall holder if she baked the bread herself, but still none the wiser. Arms keep sticking to storage box, so cover with towel. Unfastened my trousers to relieve pressure on my stomach, hope I don’t do a Margaret!!!

Choose the longer, quicker route to get to Chorug, but may not get there today after late start. Drive out of Dusanbe, the heat is really intense. Road surface is smooth, and we are all very grateful. See little brushes for sale on side of road, may stop and buy one. Tajikistan has better relationships with Russia, so diesel is easily available. Take picture of Tajik boy who sold us some Sprite. His friends join him, and hold Tajik flag in front of them. Guy walking along with hat made our of a few twigs with leaves on. Cow eating grass on a grave, needs must. Just driven through Boston, must be travelling faster than we thought.

Climbing steeply already. Stop to check temp of Hildefender. Tim wants to leave me in car with faulty hand brake on big hill. He might not need that new wedding ring if he does. Lada with double wardrobe on roof. Breakdown lorry helping stranded motorist at top of big climb. Every now and then, people have scratch out a bit of dirt and planted a few tomatoes, sun flowers …… Taking regular sips of water. Use your engine braking, as the signs say in France.

It could be cold at night on the highway. We have invented a new tongue twister – we have packed our soft shelled fleeces. Thank you all the Turkish road crews who built this road. People walking up !!!! Road side food smells delicious. Off-road to take photos of hydro electric lake. 100m round the corner is a picnic spot. 8% climb ahead, tarmac intermittent now, so eating dust. Shah Shah tunnel 2232m long. Drive slowly Tim, it is dark, and cool and shady. Feeling a bit better, sip some Coke. Steady on Daisy, don’t step out. Signs say Emergency exit point = failure brake of car. Sphincter muscle failure in any language. 42 degrees.

More people riding horses than we have seen before. Beautiful foal trotting behind its mum. Can’t waste drinking water to clean sticky hands or the Coke off my pristine tee shirt. Farmers sifting wheat by hand. (Winnowing?). Westerner with a map, talking to local. Booted Eagle – bootiful. Bit disconcerting the number of Red Cross and UN vehicles we are coming across. Has something kicked off that we don’t know about?

Boy using sparkly bag to shade himself from sun. Why do people in any settlement push their rubbish over a cliff? To keep archeologists in business? Tailor outside his house with old Singer sewing machine.

Cars getting very hot as we continue to climb, so slow down when necessary. Pass camouflaged tanks. We stop. We start again, creeping towards Afghanistan. We both put fan heater on. Atle turns air con off and opens windows. Welcome to our world. Just short of 2,000 m we reach the top. At road check we see four expedition cars, with paying customers. Very cultivated and green on this plateau. We bimble along, soaking up the atmosphere. Donkey carrying raw cotton, as opposed to cooked! Several signs for School Feeding Station, didn’t know Citiserve delivered here. (You have to have worked in Birmingham to get that one)

This is a f***ing amazing drive yells Tim. (sorry Ned). It is. Driving along dried up river beds you can imaging what they are like in spring, with the glacial melt water thundering through. Further along the highway is a lake which was formed by an earthquake, in 1911. If there is another of the same strength, the water would crash down in torrents, as far as Iran. The biggest natural disaster yet.

Cows licking salt from the rocks. We follow a lorry for ages, before getting an opportunity to overtake. Turn a corner AND THERE IS AFGHANISTAN. It looks just as I imagined it would. We off road and take photographs. Are there Taliban watching us now. Hope they don’t think I always wear coke stained tee shirts. Atle makes a phone call. Lorry sneaks past. Landies really in their element, and us. We cut a corner and get in front of lorry. Tajikistan spends 40% of its GDP on protecting its borders against drug running.

Creep down to valley. We have to back up to let lorry through. More Toyota Land Cruiser come up the other way. Advisable to stay on road if you want to avoid the land mines. Bleached Red Hot Pokers. We see a tall watch tower, manned. Get to Tarmac and use 4th gear. The hairs on the back of our necks stand up, as we think thousands of our troops are not far away. Haven’t looked at time, listened to music or measured our progress once today. It has been so thrilling.

Level with river now. Villages on either side. What do these villagers know of the war? Does it impact on their lives. Can the children swim safely? Lots of sums daubed on walls, answers are all wrong. Will have to come back to teach maths. Come to junction, take right turn. Sign saying no lorries, we follow it across a make shift bridge. Splash through stream. Startled donkeys dance in front of car. A new bridge is being built across the river, there is a Tajik flag on our side and an Afghan one on other. A barrier is across the middle a UNESCO tent is near by. Level with river again, very fast flowing. Must find out it’s name, as it flows on to become the biggest river in Central Asia. See first waterfall in weeks. Atle and Hilde must be reminded of home. Tarmac. Afghans on other side, just ordinary shepherds tending their flocks, one on a donkey. Natural features become man made borders. Do Afghan sheep make Afghan wool? Get so close to Afghan it feels as if you could reach out and touch it.

Are these Turkish road workers? We wait whilst they let a lorry come up, TJ car pushes in front of Atle and this makes it hard for the lorry. Lorry honks at car. Footpaths zig-zag down cliffs opposite, to Taliban camps and crossings. Spent so much time eulogising about other side, need to mention this side is as awesome. Young Tijik soldiers taking photos of each other.

So dusty following Atle, we lead. They can keep their windows shut. Get sprayed from waterfall our side. A discarded red headscarf is is the only colour in this rocky landscape.
Tajik soldier with binoculars trained across the gorge. Mind the roundabout, pile of stoned heaped in middle of road. Next road check soldier is putting fuel into tank through plastic bottle. Temperature drops dramatically every time we drop down to the river.

Woman carrying bread the size of lorry wheels on her head. Feeling a bit hungry now, but will be careful what I eat tonight. All the babies being taken out for a walk in the coolness of the evening. Not seen any joggers today.

It’s getting dark now. Huge moths are illuminated by head lights. Youths stroll along, some carrying lights. Stop 2km from village to check out where we can stay. Very exciting. Arrive in Kalaikhum. Crossed a raging tributary and was greeted by man saying Home Stay. You come. We followed him. Rooms on several level, self composting loo and shower with hot water. Large H&S posters educating people in personal hygiene, and how to use ash from burnt clothing to deal with human waste. We are all sleeping on roll mats in single room. Dump our stuff and go to local restaurant. I am ravenous, so have a bowl of delicious soup with barley, meat and veg. Just the job. Atle and Tim have main course of rice, pasta and meat. They say it is delicious. The Mentalist is on TV. Give my beer to Tim, and I drink his green tea.

We try to use satellite phone, but too slow. Chatted with Matt and Rachel, they are running out of time preparing for their expedition. Know the feeling. Clean teeth and climb into liners. Don’t need our soft shelled fleeces. The breeze is cooling, the river crashes just outside the window. We are 200m from Afghanistan, in Tajikistan. Best day’s transportation driving ever.

Tuesday 25th June 2013

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We have to be out of Uzbekistan today, but we don’t really want to. Shower in a box comes in handy. Crowd of men and youths come out of local houses to have a nose. Somehow our steering wheel makes everybody laugh. The Landie is full of dust, everything is dirty and we chew grit. Hilde has a clean white top on, I brought nothing white. A young man thrusts a warm flat bread in to my hand, but he will not accept payment thrust into his. It is delicious. Eat prison breakfast, bread and water. Drive out of compound,7.30am, into a bustling town. We are now really on the steppes of Central Asia. It is fantastic. People have darker skin and their eyes are becoming narrower. Everyone who smiles or talks to us flashes a mouthful of gold. We see dozens of rollers and LBJ’s with crested heads. Can you look them up for us Martin please? The plains roll away, animals are being grazed and wheat harvested by hand.

We get stopped by road check point. They look at papers and say we are not allowed to go this way. All look at maps. They want us to go back to junction with road to Afghanistan, go done it to Tebriz, back up again. We have not got time. Want to be through border this morning, gain half a day. Guard makes a phone call. He does not refuse money thrust into his hand. Result. First time we had to bribe in 8000kms. Travel on some fantastic tarmac. Drive through bustling markets, saw a little boy going to school and two large colleges. All the rivers are dry, just stoney beds. Bottled water for sale all along roadside, large water melons and bread.

Arrive at border by 10.20 am. Good mornings drive. Blimey, even I break into discussion about Manchester United now. Tim finds a solitary City supporter. Boy offers to wash car, tragic waste of precious water me thinks. Tim and Atle negotiate a diesel deal. Cheeky boys hang onto doors, took their photos. Best not take picture of shepherd’s hut here though. We wait, in heat in car. Tim says this is the first time it would be an advantage for him to wear a wedding ring, they expect to see him with one. I said we should get him one, and he agreed. Tim and Atle talk to Tajik man who has lived in Norway, and bought a LT registered car in Italy. Swop contact details. We ask about GBAO pass for Norwegians. He lives in Dushanbe, we can follow him and he will help. So that blind beggar has been miraculously cured. Praise be. People in car in front start clearing boot. Hope we don’t have to clear car.

Have slight scare over currency. Had to plead ignorance, refill form and say sorry. Then Uzbek lady was lovely. Chatted to Turkish driver, everyone was helpful and smiling. Haven’t seen carbon paper for a long time. Don’t know temp, bit we all melting. Get into Tajikistan at 13.12, just under three hours. Don’t think Atle will be able to get his GBAO permit today, we will find a hotel, rest, get clean and have a nice meal out in Dushanbe.

Just heard from Cornlanders. They are off to the mountains, looking for bears. Great to hear from family, we have a free afternoon, so may have chance to Skype. Tim has just admitted, I’d there was a swimming pool he would jump in. Poor boy, he must be hot.

Paddy fields, straw hats, snow capped mountains, more dust but new roads are being built. Large industrial plant belching acrid smoke. Ice cold rivers from mountains. Chocking on lorry fumes, we can’t get passed. Everywhere there is water, the children are glistening. Stones mark central reservation. Lorry spraying water on road to lay the dust. Onions and apples for sale. Man walking over river on pipe. Tim excited when he see land Rover Discovery 4. People waiting at bus stops, but I see no buses.

Back into a big capital city. Trolley buses. Large apartment blocks, and more being built. Good to be arriving in daylight. Range Rover Evoke, whatever next. Shady boulevades. Wedding boutiques. Parks and fountains and monuments. Arrive at Hotel Tajikistan, full of UN delegates. Our cars are dirtier than theirs.

The Red Cross Discovery parked next to us has a No Guns sticker on windows. Walk into swankiest hotel in the capital of Tajikistan looking like extras from Crocodile Dundee, and we most probably smell a little too. Never mind, our money is as good as anyone’s. Go to bar. I do not feel too good, so go for a lie down. Mr Fix It takes Tim and Atle to get their GBAO and it is sorted instantly. Mr Fix It now Atle’s NBF.

All scrub up well and put our glad rags on. Hilde spoils her sophisticated ensemble by sticking cartoon plasters on her mossie bites. Go out for very disappointing Lebanese dinner, the local wine especially. Did I mention the Belly Dancer? Atle says she is a local girl just jigging about the room. All desperate for down time, but we haven’t got space in our schedule in Tajikistan. Also, suddenly realised that we have hardly spent a moment on our own for weeks, need to build in some me time. All admit to fears before starting out, and none of us thought we would make it, even this far. But we have, bit battered and bruised, but know a lot more about ourself now. Hear 4 lads talking English, but taxi arrives so no time to talk.

We are all extremely tired and head to our rooms. Face time Esme and Claire, want to find out what Esme thought of her new teacher, Mrs Hill. She wouldn’t tell anyone, so we just nattered anyway. Texted Rachel who was still at uni, got her reply in the morning. Very hard beds.